We all have days when we feel distant from God. Oftentimes, when we are in that thought process, we let our, "Inner Critic," take over and we say some pretty mean things to ourselves. Some of the things we say to ourselves we would never dare say to another person because the words are so harsh. So why be mean to yourself? Trust me, I work on this, too, on a regular basis. Sometimes it's the enemy working against you to make you fall. If you have made a commitment to the Lord, the devil will do everything he can to distract you and cause you to dwell on your weaknesses instead of embracing God's grace.
God is the one who helps us grow in Him through His grace. We often think that we have to do it with our own strength. If this were the case, we may never mature spiritually or have a personal relationship with Him. All we have to do is open our heart and ask Him to help us grow closer. Ask God what needs to be eliminated out of your life. Then be willing to follow through when He lays it on your heart. Take authority over the enemy. When he sends you a negative thought, answer him out loud with scripture from God's Word.
We read in Psalm 119:105, “Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.” When you feel like a failure, pick up the Word of God and look to your maker to realize your value. His word is a light to our path and it is also the tool we need to use more often, to stop beating ourselves up. Before you begin to read the Bible, pray that God would open your eyes to what you need to know. Also, it's important to know that God has much patience with you and will gently lead you. Look to God and His Word to realize you are a very special person and you are deeply loved and deeply valued no matter where you are in your growth stage with Him. You're not a failure. You're forgiven.